Wounderful world

Here's a story for you....

Boy falls in love with girl.

Boy decides before last Summer to buy his first diamond ring for girl. Boy searches long and hard, brings multiple girl "sisters" and mom to ring stores to get opinions and finally buys an engagement ring & pretty matching wedding band at local reputable national ring store at a big local mall. Boy thinks he is happy with his choice because the ring is elegant, yet has a little touch of design that makes it unique.

Boy puts a some money down on layaway for a while. Ring store holds ring in the "back" for boy. Boy finally goes in about a week later to pick up this ring. Boy's mom is there to help out.

Boy is given the ring, but is told they don't presently have the diamond ring's matching certificates to verify the diamond's quality. Ring store tells the boy that the diamond has a lasered number on the diamond so it's no problem...the certificate will be mailed to the boy within 10 business days. Boy figures the ring store is reputable...so he takes rings home.

A few days later, Boy calls the Ring Store to find out they are having trouble finding the certificate. Boy takes ring back and the Store manager takes down the diamond number and says he'll find it. "The certificate will be mailed within 10 business days" says the manager.

Within a few days, the Boy flys a loooooooooong way to see the Girl that he's fallen in love with and spends the next few days trying to find a good way to hide the Ring and make a big surprise. Boy ends up having the hardest time planning anything right in the Girl's strange land, so he somehow stumbles around and proposes to Girl. Girl accepts the ring. Boy and Girl skip happily around like crazy people. Girl's parents intimidate the Boy. Storyteller digresses.

Boy comes back home.

Boy still hasn't received certificate from the Ring Store. Now the Ring Store elves tells the Boy that the manager lost the number he originally recorded. Boy tells Ring Store the diamond is now half way across the world in a strange foreign land. Boy demands Ring Store find it and write a complaint letter to the Store's King and...err.... Vice King? The Ring starts losing some of its magical powers as the Boy starts to feel like something is wrong.

The Vice King writes back apologetically, hustles and finds a certificate for the Boy. He assures the Boy that THIS certificate is almost certainly the right one, but the only way to be sure is to match up the numbers one day when the Girl comes back with the magic ring. Boy is reasonably satisfied.

A few months later, the Girl comes to visit the Boy with her magic ring. The Boy says, "Hey, no fair, I want a magic ring too!" So the Boy and Girl decide to visit the Ring Store once again together. Boy thinks, "Hey, we might as well have them match the Ring with the Certificate once and for all! THEN we can get ME a magic ring of my own and then ALLLLLL will be good in the world"

Ring Store elf looks at the Ring's shiney diamond and ends up with a number that looks nothing like the number on the certificate. "GAASP!" says the Boy and the Girl. "How can this happen?" says the Boy. The elf apologizes, takes the new number down, and says they'll find the right certificate that will restore the Ring's magic powers. All within "10 business days"

Boy and Girl are patient. They let the Ring Store elf engrave the wedding band with a magic chant once delivered by the magic fairy, Elton John. "How Wonderful Life is..." Ring Store elf starts crying when she hears of this magic fairy chant. Apparently other elves have heard of this magic fairy before...he's supposed to be powerful at golden fleece basket weaving or something.

Boy and Girl are told that the wedding band is ready two days later. "OH, that's wonderful!" says the Boy and Girl. They rush down to the Ring Store to pick up the ring and take it home where it will forever shine in its magical brilliance.

Upon taking it home, Boy and Girl are dashed to discover the wedding band isn't properly engraved with the magic fairy chant after all, but instead it says, "How Wounderful Life is..."

Turns out the Ring Store elf apparently couldn't spell, OR she had problems seeing through her magical tears.

Boy has now turned into a big green ogre and is very upset at the Ring Store and all its stupid elves.

THE END?