Business Plan

Well, I visited the Small Business Development Center yesterday to sit in to their resource orientation. I had first contacted them from the first day I was on my own.... I was so desparate for help because I had no idea what type of business structure to be. You couldn't believe the nightmare it was to learn all about tax structure crap in the midst of getting your life in order.

Anyway, I filled out their online form eventually, only to find out their online form was broken. I contacted them and even offered to fix it hahah. But I digress...

The meeting yesterday went well, I'm further encouraged to push ahead and now I want to make a good business plan as soon as possible. I have to do everything people recommend to me....if I fail (and God willing I won't), at least I can say I failed after trying everything I possibly could.

It's kind of neat though, there's a resource there full of books from every industry imaginable. I think I'll go there on Friday to read up on the Graphic Design one. That will help me with my business plan!

Life, otherwise, is good. My dad's back from Hong Kong. Unfortunately, my grandmother has leukemia and so she's in-and-out of the hospital. She's 94 though. That is some woman, I'm inspired by her even though I've only seen my grandma less then 10 times in my life and probably never spoke a full conversation with her ever. I still love her though...how can you not? She's why I'm here.

I think she's ready to go though. She's had all her family around her and she's enjoyed a happy life. Perhaps my grandpa up in Heaven needs her company. Is that bad to think that way? I hope not.

Been feeling slightly drowsy these past couple days. It's not that I haven't gotten enough sleep...but there's this shroud of drowsiness that hung over me. I even tried running it out of me yesterday but it didn't work. This morning I feel a little better though, but I still feel some of it just a little bit behind the eyes. Gotta keep forging ahead though...

Learning

Every day is a surprise....

This business is keeping me on my toes for sure. I suppose every new business person goes through these...moments of great pride, and moments of anxiety. I'll work it out but each day is something new. Now I have no-one to blame but myself.

Yesterday was a struggle with Quickbooks. DAMN that software is cool but why is it so damn hard to set up? I got it to the point I'm able to do some basic things on it, but I swear some of the stuff I'm doing must be wrong. At the end of the year I can imagine I'll bring this to my accountant and his eyes will pop out "What the hell were you doing with this?"

I'm being cautious though. I don't want Uncle Sam to catch me paying thousands in taxes this coming year. So I've been keeping pretty awesome records so far...with the help of mom! She's funny though.... what she says is "simple" ends up taking her hours to set up. Love her though.... the support she's giving me helps a lot.

Beyond my family and my business, there IS another joy I have in my life these days... I've met someone I'm beginning to care for a whole lot. She's the best....she's done so much for me already. There's a lot for us to learn about each other, but I'm definitely enjoying the journey.

OH, it doesn't hurt that she's a hotty!!

Life cycles

Bear with me... I'm in one of my moods where I'm contemplating again.

You ever had one of those situations where you wish life had a re-wind button? What would you do over again?

For instance, I recently had a house guest to visit me for the week. We had a lot of fun and got everything we wanted to do finished. I had planned this for some months as the first "vacation" I had HAD since Summer of last year.

Anyway, I dropped my guest off at the airport today and when I was driving back from the airport I flashed back to the moments my vacation first started and I just didn't feel like I wanted real life to begin again.

It would be so nice to keep life in that fun vacation state where you have no worries in the world...you just experience. You take everything into your mind and you're not expected by anyone to do anything.

I guess that's natural.... this feeling of longing will pass. I guess the important thing is to enjoy the moments that are occuring for each of us right now and to look ahead at all the things I have to look forward to in the future.

Back to work Raphael!!

Chaos

It's a little weird living this way....

One day to the next I really don't know what's going to happen and how I'm going to feel.

While I really think this is a period I've been waiting for my whole life, I get occasional panic attacks that just throws me. Can I do this? Where is my next paycheck coming from? If I can't handle this next Project...who can help?

One minute I can feel like like the most confident person in the world. The next minute I'd be cowering on my bed wondering what I got myself into.

I suppose this is how all new business owners feel? I'm not sure about that....there's GOT to be people out there who can jump into a situation like this and feel absolutely no regret and no fear of what might happen 1 month, 1 year, 10 years away...

Best thing I can do is keep climbing.

At least my business has got some forward momentum going for it. I've been lucky enough to have some clients who have remained my friends...with the intention to stick it out with me. I'm ever grateful for their trust. I DO have some leads through word-of-mouth, so I got some potential income out there....but I've learned long ago in this business not to celebrate until I got money in hand.

People are fickle. They can like you one day, they can hate you the next.

Keep climbing....keep reaching.

Am I official yet?

People say "congratulations" when they hear you've just started your own business.

I suppose that is the standard thing to say. It IS quite exciting, and ultimately it brings the promise of future success and personal fulfillment.

But "congratulations" now is quite premature I think. I'm not ungrateful to the people who offer me support and kind words...I just don't feel like I deserve it yet.

Starting a business is easy, it's just a matter of following instructions to fill out endless government forms, choosing a name, printing a few business cards, and then opening a checking account. Anyone can start a business.... I've gotten it past this point just by basically stumbling around, making mistakes, and then trying again. I might have had similar results just tossing phone numbers in the air and just calling random strangers on what to do.

Running a business past the point where it can support itself, better yet, support ME with a regular salary is probably a bigger challenge. At that point, I've proven myself. I've somehow managed to demonstrate that I've met the challenge of making an actual "business" out of nothing...and it will survive.

I think that's probably a better point to accept "congratulations" on my business, don't you think?

Homes....

Good grief.... it's staggering how expensive it is to own a home here in Hawaii these days.

The average house these days here falls somewhere in the area of $750k can you believe it? That's practically DOUBLE the price of an average home 5 years ago.

A lot of people are making big money on that though....if you own property you've made some good money. On the other hand of course, if you end up selling your home, you're still paying more for your new house too.

It's crazy!!! Look at this local article for instance. That tiny house is $850k?!! You can easily get a mansion with acres of land to go with it for that price in Texas or Ohio for instance.

I guess that's the price to pay for living in an area people call "paradise". But when we have to struggle so hard to live....how do we enjoy this paradise?