Posted by on Nov 28, 2012 in Humor, Personal, Rants | 0 comments

Here are some thoughts I just needed to jot down. 10 years from now I can see what kind of asshole I was. Wait, let me check…nope, for the most part none of these things will come back and bite me when I run for President.
  • I find envy is a horrible quality. Yet I realize that I envy people that can travel a lot.
  • I found myself looking at a friend’s picture of their kid and thought to myself “my boy is cuter than that”. Gurp. How did I become one of those parents?
  • I still think words are only as powerful as you make it. Just like those protestors holding signs outside of a movie end up publicizing the very thing they were trying to quell. Yet I’m trying to curb my use of the word “retard” 
  • “Happy Wife…happy life”.  I still think we need a quaint rhyming male version of this phrase “Happy Husband…ummm”
  • I will forever appreciate MythBusters for confirming that women are bad drivers. Scratch that, based off of my unscientific study of my wife…women are decent drivers, but horrible at parking.
  • I discovered that you can really love your family, yet really miss parts of your former bachelor days as well. We’re not talking about sex either…I’d kill for some time to make a big fat unhealthy grilled deli-meat sandwich with bacon, fresh greens and over-easy eggs. Fuck it…I’ll add some greasy slabs of Maui portuguese sausages on the side as well. No need to dab away the grease maam.
  • Thankful to my parents for holing us in their house while we remodel. But also quickly reminded why I needed to move away in the first place so many years ago.
  • I love my car. But it’s making me a car poser snob. Even I can’t stand myself. Shutup Raph…watching Top Gear and suddenly owning a decent car doesn’t make you any more knowledgeable about anything on 4 wheels.
  • Thank you Australian post office — for losing the one good gift I’ve purchased for my brother in a few years. And all that after spending $60 just for shipping. Perhaps writing “Lego” on the package description wasn’t the best idea. Somewhere down under there’s a post office delivery man building a really cool lego VW Bug. Croikey!